After much request, I am finally doing a listener call in show this Sunday. I willl answer any and all mental health questions.
The show is from 3-4 PM PST on Sunday, June 1st.
I will post the call in phone number closer to the date.
People outside the US can email questions that I can answer on the air.
Julie
It’s so hard to be generous when you feel like hell.
It’s hard to be happy for others when you’re unhappy.
It’s hard not to be jealous when you see someone get what you can’t have.
It’s hard to say, ‘I’m so proud of you! Good job! You deserve it! I’m happy for you!” when you fell like your world is falling apart.
But guess what, you can teach yourself to do it- even when you don’t feel you can do it.
I call it acting as if.
When I’m unbelievably jealous of a friend, I first have to look inside myself and see where the jealousy comes from- it usually comes from depression. In fact, if I’m jealous and depressed and mean and nasty and then the friend starts having problems, I actually feel better! It’s awful and something I fight a lot! It simply is not the real me. I am always happy for people when I’m not depressed.
So, if I treat the depression, I can decrease the jealousy.
I tell a little lie when someone does something amazing and I just want to yell and scream at them that it’s not fair that they get what I can’t have because I have bipolar disorder!
I remind myself of how much I love the person who just got the good news and I say, ‘I’m jealous, but so proud of you.”
Julie
As you may know, I’ve been taking Lamictal since 2005. It works very well for me- but it’s always a balance in terms of dosage. I actually did something really stupid last weekend. I went out of town to speak to a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) group and forgot to take my Lamictal!
Dumb. I was freaked out about it- but I thought that missing for one day shouldn’t be too much of a problem!
Wrong!
The withdrawal symptoms started on the way home – pain in my legs, then my arms, neck twitching and pretty soon, all over body twitching! These are strong drugs.
When I finally realized what was going on- I truly had no idea what it was as it came on slowly- my mom said, “I have some Lamical in my purse!” She takes it for depression and it works well for her. So thank heavens she had some.
It never entered my mind to ask if she had any- or if someone in my audience had a spare! I have extra in my car, but we ended up taking my mother’s car- I also usually have extras in my purse! This was one of those occasions when circumstances all worked against me and I didn’t make sure I was ok.
I was just stupid. It messed up my system and then I managed to miss an evening dose a few days after the trip! One week later, I’m still having problems. You should just see my head twitching as I write this! (The anxiety is pretty bad as well.)
More on this later.
Julie
Bipolar Disorder is not your fault Julie! I say this to myself a lot when I get sick.
It took me a long time to accept my diagnosis. I was diagnosed in 1995. How is it possible I’ve dealt with severe bipolar disorder since 1995!
I used to wake up and think- I have a mental illness. This isn’t happening to me!
I have nothing to do with having the illness- mood disorders are in my genes on both sides of my family.
I am only 100% responsible for managing the illness. It took these 13 years to get good at it! Now I put all of that experience in my books- it doesn’t have to take you 13 years to get better, that is for sure.
Julie
Here they are!
- Dating
- Unrealistic deadlines
- Troublesome people
- Moods of others
- Sleep disturbances such as a party next to my house
- Travel
I don’t date. I give myself time to get things done- this is always a challenge. I say goodbye instead of hello to people who want to make me miserable. I gauge the moods of others and don’t provoke or even comment on their moods if I don’t have to. I have a noise machine, a humidifier and meds to sleep if I need them. I plan for travel way, way in advance.
Having bipolar disorder is like having a child you have to take care of 24 hours a day.
But….. I am mentally healthy.
Julie
Hi Julie,
My son, age 33, is bipolar and has made bad choices/decisions. I have tried to assist him over the recent past. The issue is how do I tell whether I am assisting or enabling. I am looking for appropriate support organizations or resources to guide me.
Can you advise me?
Thanks,
R
Hello R,
You can look into the family to family program at NAMI- if you go to www.nami.org you can find a location near you.
My book Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder is for couples, but it has great info that you can use as well – the issues of caretaking are the same.
BP Magazine at www.bphope.com has a lot of info for families. I write a column for each issue.
My family uses my Health Cards to help me. They are life savers. You can use them yourself whether your son participates or not.
I need to write a book completely for family members!
These are resources here in the Us. I will find some more worldwide organizations and post them later.
Julie
OK. I have to do a shout out for David Cook!
I didn’t have a television for years- it helped a lot in terms of staying stable. I now watch reality shows with my mom- the joyful reality shows that make you hopeful when you’re feeling sick. It’s also something we can do together that doesn’t involve family issues, weight, worry, work, stress, etc!
So You Think You Can Dance started tonight here in the States. It’s a joyful show.
There really are shows out there that help depression!
Julie
David Cook!
