Bipolar Depression vs. Sadness Pt I

I’m so needy today! I feel like crying and I’m lonely. These are the very typical systems of depression, but they sure are hard to fight aren’t they!

I get so tired of having bipolar disorder

Here is a long post on the difference between feeling sad and having a bipolar disorder downswing……

This can be an awful illness- I go into a downswing when something bad and stressful happens such as a work issue or a troubled relationship, but I also go down when I have a good experience such as seeing an old friend who has to leave the next day. Most people in this situation would feel sad, I get depressed. It’s odd and it’s not fair, but it’s reality. There is a big difference between a depression downswing and feeling sad.

One of my closest friends came to visit yesterday. He lives in Seattle which is about three hours from Portland. [ Read More ]

Bipolar Depression vs. Sadness Pt II

Depression vs. Sadness Part II

The problem with depression is that it takes away the FACTS.

Here is the first fact, I only feel down about my life when I’m depressed. Here are some more facts. This wonderful man is a dear friend, but I don’t want a relationship with him. It’s my choice! My house is small, but I’m still very proud to own a house. That’s quite an accomplishment when you couldn’t work for over five years! (before I started the Health Cards) The weather always sucks in Portland in the winter. And it was just as dark yesterday when I was having fun with my friend.

I’ve already talked to two friends and my mother and brother this morning, so the idea that I don’t have people who care about me is just stupid. Not having plans on a Friday night will not kill me- I can always find something to do! [ Read More ]

Bipolar Disorder and People Who Change Plans!

I now a lot of people with bipolar disorder and we all have one thing in common. We need the people in our lives to be dependable. I used to stay in relationships with people who made me sick. Here is how they made me sick:

– Call and want to meet and then cancel

– Forget we set a time to meet and then tell me it’s my fault as I expected something from them that wasn’t actually confirmed

– Come on strong and then fade away

– Remained secretive even when they knew me well

And finally- these people in no way understood, even when I told them over and over again, that I’m an extremely flexible person [ Read More ]

Bipolar Disorder and Relationships

Relationships that Don’t Exist

Have you ever noticed that your brain can create a relationship with someone that isn’t real? Even to the point of seeing them do bad things to you or cause you problems – all in your mind!

I try hard to recognize this when it’s happening and prevent it from going too far. Only people with bipolar will really get this one as it’s so strange!

What matters is that we never act on these feelings until we are sure something is real. I’ve learned to do this. I have a lot of people around me who can listen and say- “well, Julie. It sounds like you’re making something out of nothing. The person is actually acting pretty normally and you’re trying to [ Read More ]

Remembering to Take Your Bipolar Meds

I just received this reader comment from Alexis.

It’s such an excellent idea for people who miss meds. I tend to go through phases where I mess up my meds for days at a time. It’s really dangerous sometimes. I will use this idea if I feel one of those phases coming on. It’s also a fantastic idea for traveling.

Julie-I too had a hard time remembering to take my meds. I set the alarm on my phone to 6:30am and 8:00pm to remind me to take my meds. It’s worked great. The only thing I have to remember is to bring my evening dose with me if I’m not at home at 8:00. Alexis

bipolar and work: In the middle of you now where!

I am just winding up the most difficult book I’ve ever written. Believe it or not, it’s not a book on mood disorders. It’s a book on writing ebooks and it is kicking my behind. I’ve written about it on this blog for weeks. I’ve had to work very hard to stay stable. It’s working. I basically stopped my normal life in order to deal with the problems brought up by the stress.

In the past, I guess I didn’t know what to do in order to work on tough projects. I’ve learned a lot in the past 13 years!

– I stopped going out at night completely

– I put my other work on hold even though it made me nervous

– I didn’t clean my house or car! ha ha

– I made myself go to the library to work

– I went easy on myself when I had two solid weeks of [ Read More ]