It’s hard to write about mania considering that I have been in a downswing for a week,but it’s a topic I have to continually address- I hear stories all summer about people who go off their meds because they feel so GREAT and then the disasters that follow. It’s easy to think –the sun is just so WONDERUFL!!!!!! when the weather gets nice,you’re off school,you have a vacation,the kids are home,etc.
There is no doubt that summer is wonderful if you were depressed in the winter- but this is just a friendly reminder that when things get WONDERFUL!!!!!,it’s time to check for mania. Here are some questions to ask yourself –or ask the person you care about.
1. Are you sleeping a lot less than what is considered the norm- but are still filled with energy the next day? The norm is six to eight hours- mania sleep [ Read More ]
I’m sitting here at my desk writing my column for BP Magazine. The topic is great- the length requirement is great. I have been writing these columns for years and usually enjoy the process. Today,things are tough. My anxiety is just hitting me from all sides! I feel it in my body- my brain and all around me. There is nothing wrong- I’m on track to write the article,even though I’m a few days past my deadline.Anxiety can be so debilitating because it’s so physical. I can sit and work when I’m depressed or mildly hypomanic. I can even work when I’m mildly psychotic. But anxiety is tough!!!!!I have to finish this though- I need a plan.
1. Change my writing position. I have a crate I use on top of my desk where I can stand up and write instead of sitting.
2. Do a few minutes of yoga. I have yoga [ Read More ]
How does depression find all of the bad and or depressing memories in our brain and then replay them over and over again. Where are the positive memories and how does depression skip them? Does this mean that negative memories are stored in a certain part of the brain that depression can access- or does it mean that we have negative and positive neurotransmitters –and the negative neurotransmitters are the ones triggered? Maybe serotonin goes both ways!Maybe depression blocks out the chemicals in our brains that produce positive thoughts?I have endless questions about depression. It’s the same with mania. Where does a thought and feeling such as,“I’m a genius,”come from?Why is it so easy to write depressing music when we’re depressed?Fascinating stuff. I have to approach depression with a spirit of fascination and discovery- because that is the only way we will find answers to these very complex questions.What do you think [ Read More ]
I have said this to myself many times in the past 15 years since being diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Just a few weeks ago I dealt with a lot of suicidal thoughts- even when I was crying and scared,I said,“Julie,it’s bipolar disorder. It’s going to be ok.”When I wake up depressed and think,“Oh no,not another day of depression!”I say to myself,“Get up Julie. Make it a day that isn’t ruled by depression. Then it will be ok.”Oh man. I get tired of this illness,but it’s treatable. I woke up slightly depressed this morning. I then made myself focus on what was going well in my life and the depression didn’t feel so overwhleming. Once I got up and got going,the day looked more positive. It’s getting up that makes the difference.If you’re sick today- it’s going to be ok. If you were super sick and just [ Read More ]
How I manage bipolar disorder successfully……I get a lot of questions from readers asking how I can do so well despite having chronic bipolar disorder mood swings. Here is my long answer. There is a short answer as well. I will put that at the end! **
I can vividly recall what my life was like in 1995. I was just diagnosed with bipolar disorder and I had NO idea what do to about it. There were literally no treatment plan books on the market- Kay Redfield Jamison’s book An Unquiet Mind came out that year and I devoured it! I felt hope from the book,but didn’t learn how to manage the illness. My medical bills were large and not being able to work put a huge strain on my partner Ivan. After two more years of medication troubles and constant mood swings,I said enough is enough and decided to create a plan [ Read More ]
I am constanly astonished at how much trouble I have with holidays! It’s never ending. Yesterday was Independence Day here in the states. We do some major celebrating on that day. The weather was gorgeous here in Portland,Oregon. I go to a party every year on this day. I went yesterday as well. I was pretty depressed though- and all I could think of was how other people were at better parties- and that I never get to go to cool parties. Etc. This was absolutely ridiculous as I was with friends!
If you look at the other holiday posts on this blog,you will see similar thoughts. Something about the holidays brings out the bipolar symptoms in full force. It’s the pressure of having to have a good time. Last year I went to see friends for the New Year and my birthday and it helped a lot! I always try to learn from [ Read More ]
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