I’ve received so many kind and supportive letters about my new radio show. I wish I could answer more of them! I just received a nice letter from a radio listener. She asked why there was not a show posted the past few weeks. Well… I had NO idea how much work the show would be. It has been one of the greatest experiences of my working life- but easily the most stressful endeavor of my working life. It’s definitely more stressful than writing books. I’m learning what real stress feels like. It’s hard to deal with, but not impossible. It’s nothing like the stress that comes from being sick with bipolar disorder.
I was a bit scared when I took on the show that I would have a lot of mood swings. I’m so used to getting sick when I work too much. In the past, too much was part time.
I know what stage fright – I should say radio fright- feels like now! I spoke to over 200 people for an event a few months ago. I had no stress and loved giving the talk. But the first few weeks of the radio show were so bad that I couldn’t go out at night on the weekends at all. I sometimes doubled over with a stomach ache. I felt anxious and downright panicked. It was odd. I knew I could do the show. I never thought it would be easy. But I honestly had no idea what it would feel like to go on air and be so nervous I could hardly talk. If you listen to the first shows, it may be hard to tell, but I was so nervous I felt like I was going to throw up. I could hardly breathe and the show felt like I was under water.
It’s getting better. My fabulous cohost Avi has made such a difference. Have you heard his voice? Believe it or not, he had never been on the radio and just turned out to be a natural.
This is longer than I intended! What I wanted to say is that I have a new show that should be up within the next day. It’s on child and adolescent psychiatric disorders and I’m very proud of it.
I can do this. Taking a risk is the only way to reap big rewards.
Your support means so much to me.
Julie
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