Aggressive irritation is a unfortunate symptom of bipolar disorder. It often comes with a down swing or a mixed episode where you’re manic and depressed at the same time.
We all experience irritation- that’s a normal part of life. Getting cut off on the free way- rude people- crowds- long lines at the supermarket.
Aggressive irritation is much more bipolar disorder related- this irritation has a lot of strength behind it. Instead of getting irritated when we get cut off on the free way- we yell and scream, honk the horn and if particularly bad- actually chase down the person with our car. Oh yes, this happens!
If someone is rude to a person in an aggressive irritated mood swing- they had better watch out- the person with bipolar may say, “What the @$@#$#@ are you looking at! You have a problem with me!” And will then move in on them and practically growl.
Some other signs of this aggressive irritation: throwing things- such as wanting to throw your @$@!$ computer across the room when the internet won’t work. Or feeling your head twitch because you’re so angry at something.
This is NOT good stuff, but it’s common.
Bipolar medications can cause this aggressive irritation as well.- so if you’ve started a new bipolar medication and this anger shows up- talk with your doctor immediately.
An aggressive irritation mood swing a very dangerous place to be when you have bipolar disorder as you could end up in jail- after just a few minutes of blind action. You have to know the very first signs that you’re getting irritated and do something about these little signs before they turn into the aggression. If you do sports, this is a good time to really kick a ball hard or run as far as you can. Some sun salutation yoga is also a good idea. Fast walks help as well.
If you don’t do sports, breathing helps as does walking away from what causes you problems. My biggest tool is talking myself down, “Julie, this is bipolar anger and you need to deal with the bipolar. It’s a bit over the top right now, so slow down and do something for yourself instead of putting this mood swing on someone else!” I write about irritaion and anger in all of my books as it is such a destructive part of bipolar disorder.
You can also take out your aggression on a journal page- that way no one gets hurt!
Julie
PS: You can read my irritation/anger Health Card and get a good laugh. Some of the things I think and do when I’m in this mood can be pretty stupid!
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A few hours later- I just received a comment from Carolyn that is so interesting and helpful I am putting it here:
This really hit home with me….I usually see it as passive/aggressive with me…..when I am irritated, I can be soooo passive/aggressive. I just want to strike out, but do it in this way to others…..but usually I am the one who is hurt and the other person has no idea what is going on. I am so angry, irritated…..it is when I feel like I am being pushed in a corner and I need to claw my way out…. this is usually triggered by people who want to tie me up on the phone or just want to talk and talk. I have a son, who has no one but me to talk to and I am not taking charge of this situation and it triggers this reaction in me. Maybe some others will read this and see the same in themselves and maybe even offer advice, but I will probably not take it since I am in this pattern of behavior that I am having difficulty breaking. I need a therapist and have one, but my next appointment is in Sept. In the meantime, I will read my self-help books and try to do what I already know that I am supposed to do….since this is my son and these are friends who are driving me over the cliff, I find it difficult cutting off this behavior that is so damaging to me. Makes my bipolar worst. Thanks for giving me a chance to make a comment. Thank you for your blog.
Carolyn
Related posts: Bipolar disorder and anger/aggression/irritation | Ask Julie: Bipolar Anger and Irritation | Reader question: Mania and irritation |
This really hit home with me….I usually see it as passive/aggressive with me…..when I am irritated, I can be soooo passive/aggressive. I just want to strike out, but do it in this way to others…..but usually I am the one who is hurt and the other person has no idea what is going on. I am so angry, irritated…..it is when I feel like I am being pushed in a corner and I need to claw my way out…. this is usually triggered by people who want to tie me up on the phone or just want to talk and talk. I have a son, who has no one but me to talk to and I am not taking charge of this situation and it triggers this reaction in me. Maybe some others will read this and see the same in themselves and maybe even offer advice, but I will probably not take it since I am in this pattern of behavior that I am having difficulty breaking. I need a therapist and have one, but my next appointment is in Sept. In the meantime, I will read my self-help books and try to do what I already know that I am supposed to do….since this is my son and these are friends who are driving me over the cliff, I find it difficult cutting off this behavior that is so damaging to me. Makes my bipolar worst.
Thanks for giving me a chance to make a comment. Thank you for your blog.
Carolyn
Thank you for this; I had no idea that meds can cause this. I used to have euphoric mania, but lately it’s been dysphoric. I’ve also had meds changes. I’ll check into this with my psychiatrist.
You hit the nail on the head! That is how I am feeling today and I have so many errands that have to be done today! Which means interacting with others and I feel really snappy! I am told you can tell what kind of mood I am just by looking at my face (something I am not proud of at times!) So, I am glad I read your post and will take care when approaching people, places and things today. A positive, yoga class at the end of the day with my daughter. Originally I told her I was busy (not, just too agitated, depressed, etc. to even think of a yoga class) but I think I will get my rear in gear, do what needs to be done and reward myself with one of my favorite things to do. YOGA! Thanks again Julie for putting it out there, your insights, wisdom and all. I feel better already!
Hi Julie,
Your Aug.10 item interested me because it shows a thoughtful realization of the effects of bipolar actions on others, particularly those close to them.
If you’re interested, I just had a small book published which deals with this general problem, called “The Crashing Ego”.
You are a good example of how bipolars are often quite talented.
Keep writing!
I have friends that have stories about a “crazy friend” out of control. I’m that friend. Those examples above in your story hit a hard note for me.
this really has nothing to do with ur post just the fact that we are bipolar. my boyfriend of one year recently broke up with me as he told me wa sbecause of my bipolar. like i can help it. both my mom and dad had it bad soi inheried, i tend to think i am staying on top of things but yes i did experience alot of lows and he looked at it as personality flaws no my disease. it just pisses me off he didnt understand.
Hi Julie,
Thought you might be interested in my friend George Denslow’s book, Living Out of Darkness: A personal journey of embracing the bipolar opportunity. After 20+ years of working with a holistic spiritual approach to what he calls his ‘bipolar opportunity’, he wanted to share what he’s learned with others who are suffering. Among other things, he gives a detailed description of the various types of up and down swings that he’s experienced.
My daughter-in-law is bipolar and alcoholic, though in denial about the latter. She is extremely rude and seems to have no concern for the effect her behavior has on those that love her. It is very hard to deal with, and we are all walking on eggshells. She has three small children. I need some insight.