Sorry guys, I am going to be a broken record for a few days about my travels and how they affect bipolar disorder. I’m on the East Coast and wow, I have had sleep problems. Last night I stayed up late (midnight) to watch the football playoffs and when I finally got to bed I had visions of Payton Manning (quarterback of the Indianapolis Colts) throwing the ball all night. Then I heard words from the game and words from the conversations with my friends. I really love being with people, but I easily get overstimulated. It’s not good for me.
This brain chatter is like having a train go through my head. It just won’t turn off. I have a section in my book Get it Done When You’re Depressed called Expect Brain Chatter. I just read that strategy again. It’s true- the running commentary in your head that keeps going even when you’re sleeping can be very stressful and tiring!
Eventually, at 2:30 I just took some of my Ativan (Lorazepam) in order to sleep. I am lucky it works well for me at a very small dose. I can get to sleep on 1mg or even .5 if I’m already a bit tired. I don’t know why I just don’t take it from the beginning. It’s like I feel I have to get to sleep on my own in order to prove something. This has always been a struggle. I just need to take the darn stuff.
I am worried about these sleep problems, but I want to have fun tonight with my friends! We are going to watch football and talk. So what can I do to make sure I sleep well! I will work on that. It’s always a trade off, isn’t it.
Julie
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