Bipolar Happens Blog – Julie Fast

Three Tips for Family Members

Three Tips for Family Members

1. Read, read, read: Knowledge about bipolar disorder is your number one tool. Read the DSM-IV diagnostic manual and learn about bipolar disorder. It’s only about ten pages- but you can learn so much! All libraries have this book in their reference department. While you’re there, read about psychotic disorders as well. And if you’re really interested, read about personality disorders and anxiety disorders. People with bipolar disorder share symptoms with all of these disorders which is why it’s such a tough illness to treat. And of course, my books are a great read as well!

2. Set limits: It’s hard to set limits when the person you care about might leave. But…. that’s what has to be done when someone has mood swing problems.

A. You cannot smoke pot or drink in my house.
B. Yelling is not an option. If you feel angry, please take care of it before you come into my house.
C. I can only see you if you’re on medications.

Tough stuff to say. It often takes families years to do this. I find that saying the following helps:

“You have bipolar disorder and I can tell you’re in a mood swing. I’m here to help, but only if you communicate with me. It’s not acceptable for you to yell at me or ignore my feelings. This is an illness and you have to take care of the mood swings if you want me in your life. I will help in any way I can.”

I’ve had to do this with a family member a few times. I used to fight when they wanted a fight, but not anymore. It’s an illness and they need help. Only they can choose to get it.

3. Learn about the Bipolar Conversation and use it 24 hours a day. I created this technique and it’s in all of my books. You can just read the Bipolar Conversation chapter in Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder and change forever the way you interact with a person who has bipolar disorder. I guarantee it.

It’s hard to care about someone with this illness. We’re difficult people when we don’t manage the illness successfully. Learn all you can about our symptoms, set limits and learn how to talk to us when we’re in a mood swing. All of these ideas can start immediately. I created the Health Cards for families just as much as for people with the illness. It really does take a village to help us stay stable! You can use the Health Cards even if the person you care about won’t take your help. They work.
Julie

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News Release
Julie will be presenting at the 2008
DBSA conference.

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 12
8:00 a.m. – 11:00 a.m.
More information about the program here:

If you have not signed up for the newseltter- you can do so at www.bipolarhappens.com.  There is a sign up link on the top menu. This is a great place to find out more about my Health Cards Treatment Plan.

I write as much practical information as possible in these newsletters. This is a tough illness to manage and we need all of the help we can get!

My book Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder is an excellent resource for partners of people with bipolar disorder. ( We have some challenges!) Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder also has excellent family tips.

 Julie

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This entry was posted on Thursday, August 14th, 2008 at 3:27 pm and is filed under Friends & Family, Newsletters. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.