Many people may think it odd that I start talking about my holiday plans in August! Now it’s September and I’m moving into holiday planning mode full time. I’ve had way, way too many depressed and stressed holidays to go through them again. It’s odd, because I have family and friends in my life who are very dear to me- but often our plans don’t work out or I find myself in the dark weather of the Pacific Northwest.  So many of us in this area deal with the symptoms of seasonal affective disorder as well! I think the poll to your right reflects the same concerns for many of us with bipolar disorder.  (There is a new poll up as of today- the past polls will be displayed soon.  58% of the people who tool the holiday poll said the holidays were very stressful. ) So let’s do something about it!

My solution? I plan now as much as I can for the traditional holidays that are expected in the next few months. I know where I will be, who I will be with and hopefully it’s somewhere in the sun!

So, I invite you to look ahead to the November and December holidays and then project into the New Year’s Eve celebtrations as well. Where do you want to be and who do you want to be with! There is plenty of time to plan.

Julie

I am constanly astonished at how much trouble I have with holidays! It’s never ending. Yesterday was Independence Day here in the states. We do some major celebrating on that day. The weather was gorgeous here in Portland, Oregon.   I go to a party every year on this day. I went yesterday as well. I was pretty depressed though- and all I could think of was how other people were at better parties- and that I never get to go to cool parties. Etc. This was absolutely ridiculous as I was with friends!

 If you look at the other holiday posts on this blog, you will see similar thoughts. Something about the holidays brings out the bipolar symptoms in full force. It’s the pressure of having to have a good time. Last year I went to see friends for the New Year and my birthday and it helped a lot!  I always try to learn from my past in terms of staying well- for next year I know that I need to have more than one plan for the 4th. Maybe a few parties to go to where I can pick and choose. Or maybe I can just to go another country. ha ha.

I know this is a very premature question- but do you have plans in mind for the winter holidays? I want to visit friends again, so I have to think of the airline tickets, dates and all of that at least three months in advance. I want to stay well and have fun like I did last year in Texas and Florida.

 julie

I just did a teleseminar on ‘bipolar disorder and the holidays.’ It went really well. I just can’t believe how bipolar disorder symptoms are exacerbated during the holidays… but it happens for many of us.

One of the main problems we face is loneliness during specific days such as New Years Eve. I’m a big believer in planning ahead in order to prevent depression. If you don’t have plans for a day that’s important to you, there is still plenty of time! I find New Year’s Eve especially hard simply because I’m single (by choice, but it still feels lonely at this time of the year!) and we all know we have to kiss someone sexy and wonderful at midnight! Of course, I am being sarcastic here- the media creates expectations that can’t always be fulfilled! I had a bad experience last year, so I made sure this one would be great!

If you don’t have plans for December 31 and you’re worried that you’re be depressed, I highly suggest you visit www.meetin.org  or www.meetup.com find some fun stuff to do! If anyone has great ideas for how to spend New Year’s Eve when you’re not sure what to do- definitely send them along!

 Julie

Hi to everyone,

Thank you for the kind messages! I have so many blogs to post- but I’m snowed in without my computer! I am using my mother’s today. I have been going bonkers- it’s amazing how not having a car has messed up my schedule and caused depression.

I have really focused on getting better. All of the parties I was looking forward to were cancelled, including a Christmas Eve pot luck tonight.  I forgot to bring enough Lamictal to my mom’s- I don’t have my Ativan in case I have sleep problems- I had two very serious down swings yesterday. It’s all RIDICULOUS! A friend of mine, who also has bipolar disorder called and said she was having a tough time as well!

This is why I had the holiday teleseminar last week! If you’re reading this and feeling depressed, never forget that this is a day just like any other day if you think about it.  Also, if you’re depressed, you are not alone- many people are depressed right now. It’s a bipolar thing!

But, this doesn’t mean things have to stay this way. I took a long walk in the snow today with my mother. I got some work done, though it was tough. I made myself focus on what is going well and I made plans to go out with a friend tonight. 

 And… my mom has Lamictal as she takes it as well. So I was ok meds wise. If you’re planning a trip any time soon, be really careful about meds. It’s a good idea to take more with you than needed and put them in separate places in case luggage gets lost. I only went across town and managed to forget mine!

Hang in there if today is tough. Think of what you want tomorrow to look like.  It’s never too late to plan something fun.

Julie

 Meetin.org is a social group where people get together and do a variety of events from wine tasting, playing poker, learning to line dance, going to karaoke, having big parties, traveling to Vegas and watching football!  People plan their own events and then others can sign up. It’s not a singles club- at all, and people of all ages participate. I met one of my closest friends at a meetin.org karaoke party. And, most importantly- the people in the group tend to be really fun.  There are groups all over the world. If you join,  let me know your first event! Here is the address: www.meetin.org Julie

If you read down a few posts, you will see that I wrote about the ‘holiday horrors’ and how this time of year can be so stressful for people with bipolar disorder. I have received some great comments. I posted one below and here is another one!

There are always two sides to every issue!  I swear, this letter is so lovely and the invitation so amazing, I should go!  

 **

Julie, even before I got to the end of your blog, I just knew I HAD to invite you to my house to celebrate Thanksgiving!  You are cordially invited to attend, and to bring along a guest!  Airfare this time of year is pricey, but you’d have fun and enjoy the area – I live in Stafford, Virginia, which is just south of Washington, DC in a very historic county – first settled in the 1600’s, boyhood home to George Washington.  I could go on just about my lovely area.  But I won’t! I do hope you would seriously consider coming here for Thanksgiving some day, as it is by far my FAVORITE holiday. 

Why?  I dearly love having a full table of family and friends enjoying a meal that I’ve planned for and enjoyed preparing.  I usually don’t get to cook or bake so elaborately since I commute to work, but that is one day where I indulge myself!  Turkey, gravy, fluffy mashed potatoes, butternut squash, veggies, homemade cranberry sauce and homemade dinner rolls…  And then there’s dessert!  I bake a very good pie – so far, I haven’t found any pie that beats mine for either taste or appearance (my grandmother said, “Never trust a woman who doesn’t like her own cookin’.”)  I bake cherry, pumpkin, apple, and caramel-pecan for dessert.  I may also add a trifle or pumpkin roll, as well, depending on the number of guests we expect.  I love the sound of the Thanksgiving Day parades on TV and the smells of turkey and pies emanating from the kitchen.  I don’t feel the stress that Christmas brings (the present issues get me stressed) and I am in no rush to rush Christmas, so the entire weekend is one to enjoy. 

I do not hit the stores on the Friday after Thanksgiving.  I’ll quilt, or garden, or some other enjoyable activity, and munch on leftovers for meals (mmm!) I hope someday you may be able to share a similar feeling about Thanksgiving.  At any rate, feel free to consider yourself invited to our home for the holiday! Most sincerely,Sandra 

 **Thank you Sandra! People are so wonderful! So, now that you have read the few posts before this one, you have some ideas on how to spend the holiday next week. What will work for you to keep you happy and stable on this traditional day?  Julie  

hi! I just received this great comment from Debbie regarding my post about Thanksgiving.

Amen! This year my husband and I decided to do just that…..say no and do our OWN Thanksgiving. I was always going to other’s homes for Thanksgiving but hauling half my kitchen over there. We decided we would have a small dinner at our house. If it ends up us ALONE, well what’s so bad about that! We have ruffled feathers and caused a massive fruit basket turnover but we have never been happier and we are looking forward to Thanksgiving for the first time in our 33 year marriage! We call it ‘house rules’ now. You are welcome to our home, but you will follow our ‘house rules’. My husband likes to say, ‘Be nice or leave’. It has put a hault to much traffic but those that come seem to be the ones we wanted here anyway. And the meal is just part of the day. The parades, ballgames, naps, shopping and being with people you love is the other part. Enjoy!

**

wow, I could not have said it better. A friend of mine is coming into town and we will do something fun with my mom and then I will go over to some friends who will be finished with their obligatory family get together that always stresses them out.

Please know that I’m not against Thanksgiving at all- in fact, I think it can be a wonderful occasion. I’m simply saying that you can do what you want on that day- even if it does ruffle turkey feathers!

You have a week to decide what works for you!

For those of you outisde the states- Thanksgiving is a huge family/friend get together where your table is literally covered in traditional Thanksgiving food-  a huge turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, rolls, cranberry sauce, corn ,string beans, black eyed peas, ham, ambrosia- a southern dish of oranges and coconut, etc etc. At least that was my family in Alabama!

julie