When I have a lot of mood swings, as I’m having now- managing bipolar disorder becomes my job. Everything I do has to be examined- will this help me get better? Will this make me more ill?

 It’s hard. I just want to be a person who gets up, works, sees friends and family, has fun and goes to bed. That is my dream! I have lived it a few times.

Now the bipolar is back. I have to be ready for it.

This afternoon, I saw a nice looking woman who was in her 50’s walking down the street. She was very well dressed. The well part of me thought, “Wow, those are great shoes!” The sick part of me thought, “What is the point of even looking at her shoes, we will all be dead eventually.”

It takes a lot of work to have conflicting thoughts like these- you have to know what is real and what is ridiculous!  Managing bipolar is my job when I’m sick. I do it 24 hours a day until I’m better.

 Julie

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One Bipolar Drama After Another!

I used to have a lot of drama in my life. Much of it was due to my own choices, some of it was due to bipolar disorder causing me to make stupid choices, such as when I get manic.

I have changed completely in the past few years. I’m no longer willing to make decisions and then just hope they turn out ok.

I get too sick when I do this. I have goals in life that I want to reach-  speaking to large groups on mental health, reducing the suicide rate in this country, financial stability, physical health- big stuff for sure!
The only way I can accomplish my goals is to examine every potential decision for disaster (drama!) from sending an email to saying yes to a request. I’ve learned to ask myself the following questions:

Will it make me sick?

Has it made me sick in the past?

Am I manic?

Is depression clouding my judgment?

How will my decision make me feel tomorrow, next week and into the future?
I also have a lot of people in my life who will ask the questions for me and really make me mad! But I need their judgment in case I’m making a decision when I’m sick.

This is a constant exercise- I’ve learned to slow down a bit. I’m at over 50% success right now in my decision making. Considering that I used to do everything blindly, this is pretty good!

I have almost no drama in my life these days.

Julie

Hello All,
I’m doing a very special interview with my mother this week on the Julie Fast Radio Show. If you would like to ask her a question, please send me an email and I will try to answer it on the air. I can’t guarantee it will be on, but I will get to all that I can. 

I have to say that my mother is an expert on helping a child who has bipolar disorder. We have worked together to manage this illness for eight years. We have some good tips that can work for all families.

My mother and I will talk at length about the Health Cards and how they literally saved our relationship. (If you’re new to this blog, the Health Cards are the treatment system I talk about on my site bipolarhappens.com)

You can go to www.juliefast.com/radio to send an email. You can also listen to the archived shows from the past two  months. I especially recommend the show with Don Moore- a friend of mine whose daughter has schizophrenia. 

 
I never thought I would be well enough to work again- but it’s happening. I just want to remind you to never give up- just over a year ago I was too ill to work full time, but today I can. I’ve made a lot of scarifies to get here, but it’s worth it. Working is wonderful and I don’t take it for granted!

Julie

Hi,

I’m very excited about my radio show today as my guest is my coauthor Dr. John Preston!

We’re going to talk about medications.

I promise that you will learn more than you ever thought possible in just one hour about antidepressants such as Prozac, Zoloft, Wellbutrin and Effexor- antipsychotics such as Abilify, Zyprexa, Risperdal and Seroquel and mood stabilizers/anti convulsants such as Tegretol, Depakote and my drug Lamictal. We will talk about antianxiety meds such as Ativan, Klonopin and Valium and then touch on how these medications are used to treat specific illnesses.

All in one hour!

You can listen live - go to www.juliefast.com/radio and click on the link for the KTRO radio station web site. There will be a listen live button on the KTRO home page:

The show is on today (Sunday, April 20th) at 3 PM PST here in the US.
If you can’t listen live, the show will be posted on the juliefast.com site two days after the broadcast.

I remember when I was first diagnosed- the meds were so overwhelming- I wish I had been able to access a show like this one!
Julie

I’m a presenter at the National Alliance on Mental Illness conference this June 13th-16th in Orlando, Florida. For those of you outside the US, NAMI is a large mental health advocacy nonprofit organization.  They have a strong focus on family. I’m teaching a class called Loving Someone with a Mental Illness.  This is the first time in the past six years that I have been well enough to travel and teach!

All of this sounds great, right? Well… let me tell you… travel is very, very difficult for me. I sometimes wonder if it’s worth it. I booked my flight today- I had to get a flight that leaves at midnight in order to get to the conference on time.

That freaks me out. How am I going to get enough sleep? Will it cause mood swings? What if I don’t sleep at all? Will I have to take meds and sleep in the afternoon which means I will miss part of the conference?  How will I deal with the time change? I don’t do well with that at all. It’s also expensive- NAMI doesn’t pay my way as they are a nonprofit. Is it really worth doing all of this just to teach one session? I then have to miss one of my radio shows…… which means prerecording before I leave. bla.

I could go on like this forever. So here is what I’m going to do.

I booked the ticket so that I have plenty of time coming and going. This means less stress so that I can at least get some sleep on the plane. In the past, I would have worried more about booking the tickets than actually doing it. This is one of the strategies in Get it Done When You’re Depressed- you don’t have to be depressed to use the strategies in this book! The one I used says, “Don’t worry about something- do something.” Oh, how true.

As for the three hour time change- I will get on Florida time a week before I leave. Then the time change won’t lead to mood swings. I can change my schedule about 30 minutes a night. The bipolar brain responds to this a lot better than just doing it all in one day.

I can box and send my books to the conference ahead of time. This costs a bit more, but it much easier than bringing them in a suitcase.

Many people there have a mental illness, so there will be a lot of understanding company! They worry about the same things I do.

I can pack ahead of time for once- using a list I prepare way in advance. Wow, what a novel idea.

I also have a travel health card I can look over – it has a lot of tips that I wrote the last time I traveled- such as how to handle stressful airports.

I will be fine.

I’m much, much healthier than I used to be bipolar wise and can actually travel alone again. That is a huge improvement. I want to focus on that.

Do you have to travel anywhere in the next few months? If it has been a problem in the past, you can start preparing now!

I have two months before I leave, and much of what I have to do will be taken care of in the next few weeks. I’m learning!

Julie