Comments on: Reader Question: What if my daughter’s therapist cancels appointments? http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/ by Julie A. Fast Sat, 20 Mar 2010 00:13:55 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Cynthia http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/comment-page-1/#comment-1835 Cynthia Mon, 22 Jun 2009 01:38:41 +0000 http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/#comment-1835 Dear Julie, I just purchased your book, "Loving Someone with bipolar disorder", but after a few pages, which I will read the entire book, I am feeling a bit discouraged. My husband and I have been together since high school, we have been married 32 years with a brief divorce ( 1 year) due to an affair he was in with a woman with BP. My mother in law, while alive, suffered from BP, my brother in law, schizophrenia. My husband is very smart and highly educated and has been diagnosed by a Psych with BP, he will not accept this diagnosis, he has self medicated heavily with alcohol for approx. 15 years, at times has used marijuana and tried cocaine, his Dr. prescribes concerta for his ADD and he and I are good when he does not drink, but he says his mind always feels crazy. I love this man, but I am worn out truly. I want to always show respect for him and kindness, things are tough. I work as a flight attendant and this gives me a break. I have always been faithful to my husband even when he has not been able to give this to me. I need some encouragement. Thanks for your time, Julie. I will continue to read your book. Sincerely, Cynthia Dear Julie,
I just purchased your book, “Loving Someone with bipolar disorder”, but after a few pages, which I will read the entire book, I am feeling a bit discouraged. My husband and I have been together since high school, we have been married 32 years with a brief divorce ( 1 year) due to an affair he was in with a woman with BP. My mother in law, while alive, suffered from BP, my brother in law, schizophrenia. My husband is very smart and highly educated and has been diagnosed by a Psych with BP, he will not accept this diagnosis, he has self medicated heavily with alcohol for approx. 15 years, at times has used marijuana and tried cocaine, his Dr. prescribes concerta for his ADD and he and I are good when he does not drink, but he says his mind always feels crazy. I love this man, but I am worn out truly. I want to always show respect for him and kindness, things are tough. I work as a flight attendant and this gives me a break. I have always been faithful to my husband even when he has not been able to give this to me. I need some encouragement. Thanks for your time, Julie. I will continue to read your book.
Sincerely, Cynthia

]]> By: kathy http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/comment-page-1/#comment-1641 kathy Sat, 23 May 2009 23:27:33 +0000 http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/#comment-1641 Thank you Julie, I will pass this on to my daughter. Have a lovely holiday weekend. Thank you Julie, I will pass this on to my daughter. Have a lovely holiday weekend.

]]> By: Sandra http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/comment-page-1/#comment-1640 Sandra Sat, 23 May 2009 23:25:54 +0000 http://bipolarhappens.com/bhblog/reader-question-what-if-my-daughters-therapist-cancels-appointments/#comment-1640 I had an appointment with my psychologist yesterday at 1:00. I left work early, thinking I'd have plenty of time to get there. Memorial Day traffic on I-95 was horrible - there'd been a bad accident that had closed southbound traffic lanes for 45 minutes earlier in the day and it was basically a parking lot. I phoned my therapist's office from the car and explained what was happening and begged (I am not exaggerating here!) for him to please call me as it was very important for me to talk to him. I was told that he doesn't do that, and that they can't bill my insurance company for phone calls. I told the secretary to bill me directly, that I would gladly pay out of pocket to talk with him for even 15 minutes! No, they just don't do that. Now, I'd also tried earlier in the week to see if I could get in earlier than Friday, as I really needed to talk with him about a crucial issue. My next appointment is June 3. Why did I want to talk? Because I don't think my school will offer me another contract for next year because of my most recent hospitalization for anxiety. I was out three days (they don't like it when we're out) but wrote lesson plans and sent them in via FAX and email - even from the hospital. I don't know what to do. I've never lost a job before and the thought terrifies me. I love teaching there, and I thought I'd retire there. But the stress of this year has brought out BP symptoms - I won't go into it, but just understand that it's been very, very difficult. I am really mad with my psychologist. If one of my students' parents needed to talk, I would call - and I'd be expected to call! There is no one out there to talk to about this. I think it's time to switch my psychologist. He certainly didn't care enough, when I was in obvious distress, to even call - during a time when he had no one as it was my appointment time and I was stuck in traffic. I need someone who is actually going to care about me. Sandra Hi Sandra, I understand your feelings on this. When we are in pain we need others to respond to our pain - and yet our health care professionals can't always do that. They see so many people in a day. I am not sure why your therapist didn't call, but it was obviously very upsetting. I try to remember that when I'm in crisis, others aren't so they may not match my level of need. Does that make sense? Bipolar makes me practically hysterical sometimes and yet others around me are so calm and normal. I try to get perspective. That IS scary about your job. I truly understand. It's hard to live life and have a mental illness- but there are ways around it. I hope you can feel better soon so that you can methodically make plans to keep your job. It's step by step- it can get overwhelming to think of all of this at once. To be honest, what I'm writing is about myself as much as it is about you. I just want you to know that others have the same struggles- and we can all find a way to work it out. I am going to go early to my office tomorrow and get things done. Please let me know how you are doing! Julie I had an appointment with my psychologist yesterday at 1:00. I left work early, thinking I’d have plenty of time to get there. Memorial Day traffic on I-95 was horrible – there’d been a bad accident that had closed southbound traffic lanes for 45 minutes earlier in the day and it was basically a parking lot.

I phoned my therapist’s office from the car and explained what was happening and begged (I am not exaggerating here!) for him to please call me as it was very important for me to talk to him. I was told that he doesn’t do that, and that they can’t bill my insurance company for phone calls. I told the secretary to bill me directly, that I would gladly pay out of pocket to talk with him for even 15 minutes! No, they just don’t do that. Now, I’d also tried earlier in the week to see if I could get in earlier than Friday, as I really needed to talk with him about a crucial issue. My next appointment is June 3.

Why did I want to talk? Because I don’t think my school will offer me another contract for next year because of my most recent hospitalization for anxiety. I was out three days (they don’t like it when we’re out) but wrote lesson plans and sent them in via FAX and email – even from the hospital. I don’t know what to do. I’ve never lost a job before and the thought terrifies me. I love teaching there, and I thought I’d retire there. But the stress of this year has brought out BP symptoms – I won’t go into it, but just understand that it’s been very, very difficult.

I am really mad with my psychologist. If one of my students’ parents needed to talk, I would call – and I’d be expected to call! There is no one out there to talk to about this. I think it’s time to switch my psychologist. He certainly didn’t care enough, when I was in obvious distress, to even call – during a time when he had no one as it was my appointment time and I was stuck in traffic. I need someone who is actually going to care about me.

Sandra

Hi Sandra,

I understand your feelings on this. When we are in pain we need others to respond to our pain – and yet our health care professionals can’t always do that. They see so many people in a day. I am not sure why your therapist didn’t call, but it was obviously very upsetting. I try to remember that when I’m in crisis, others aren’t so they may not match my level of need. Does that make sense? Bipolar makes me practically hysterical sometimes and yet others around me are so calm and normal. I try to get perspective. That IS scary about your job. I truly understand. It’s hard to live life and have a mental illness- but there are ways around it. I hope you can feel better soon so that you can methodically make plans to keep your job. It’s step by step- it can get overwhelming to think of all of this at once. To be honest, what I’m writing is about myself as much as it is about you. I just want you to know that others have the same struggles- and we can all find a way to work it out. I am going to go early to my office tomorrow and get things done. Please let me know how you are doing! Julie

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