bipolar mood swings and the beauty of a rose

Bipolar is so very weird. When I’m depressed I can look at this rose and see nothing of beauty. I’ve also had experiences where the beauty of something is painful because I feel so left out.

With mania, the rose is too beautiful. I could look into it forever – which is not exactly true as when I’m manic I don’t do anything for very long. My attention would be grabbed by something even more beautiful.

When my ex partner Ivan was really psychotic and in the hospital- I took him a rose- it had a lot of symbolic meaning to him- it was blood red- it caused pain- etc.

Well, it’s pretty obvious that a rose isn’t just a rose is a rose…. ;)

Today I want to just look at the rose for what it is. A beautiful flower.  I live in Portland, Oregon- also known as the [ Read More ]





Bipolar disorder and the economy: A great reader comment

Here is a comment from J. on my blog about the economic climate in this country- it’s a good one!

thank u for this. I needed some cheering up. financially we are at out wits’ end. I function only due to my meds. without them i’d be dead now. bipolar is no joke, and having financial problems on top of it…well, it’s hard to stay sane. I CAN choose to enjoy as much of my life THIS MOMENT as I can, no matter what is going on around me. so I try. I fight depression. my meds keep me from mania which is good or we’d be in worse trouble. I thank god I still have left things to be thankful for RIGHT NOW. tomorrow will be dealt with tomorrow. that’s how I cope with money problems I can’t fix. one day at a time. if I live in the present I can cope [ Read More ]





bipolar disorder and going to the hospital

Just out of the Hospital?

Here are some tips:

- Try to recreate the hospital environment at home so that you can ease back into life.  Hospitals can be traumatic, but they can also be comforting. There is a routine with set meal times and doctor rounds. Structure helps so much when you get out of the hospital.

- Forget the guilt. Just let it go. I mean this. You went to the hospital because you were sick. If anyone is telling you otherwise, tell them they have to mess with me! People who are seriously physically ill go to the hospital and their loved ones feel relief that the person is safe. A person goes to a psych ward and everyone gets freaky scared! You went to the hospital because you have a physical illness called bipolar disorder and it got a bit too strong for you to take care of it on your [ Read More ]





Reader Question: What if my daughter’s therapist cancels appointments?

   A  Reader Question for Julie

Hi Julie,

My daughter takes Lamictal and Lexpro and I believe she is going to talk to the new Psychiatrist about increasing the dosage, when she finally gets to meet him this week. My daughter has found a therapist that she likes but the therapist has cancelled some appointment- two I think. My daughter has very limited time due to her job so she cannot reschedule in the same week and it’s a time that she really needs the appointment.

I have to say it ticks me off considering this persons job. I’d think the therapist would be more aware of the effect, for many reasons. Is it unusual for a patient to ask for a phone apt.? Just a thought. I don’t want to react with the anger I feel and would like to make a helpful suggestion.

Thanks again, and at [ Read More ]





Bipolar Disorder and Travel – 3 tips for the holiday weekend

Three Travel Tips for the Holiday Weekend

It’s a three day weekend here in the states. Many people are traveling out of town or have events on the weekend.  On the other hand, there are those who are lonely and wish they had something planned.  Holidays can be tough for both sides. If I’m manic, I’ll just go have a blast no matter where I am. I’d walk up to strangers and she what they’re doing. If I’m depressed, all I can think about is that other people have a lot more fun than I do. They go to picnics and see people and throw Frisbees and have a wonderful time. I’m sure I’m missing out.

Of course this is a great illustration that my moods are not my own- and that I need to get focused and create my own moods. I do this by planning ahead.

Here are some tips:

[ Read More ]





When You’re Really Sick… make salsa…

Oh man am I sick today.. depression has me in it’s tentacles!

- It’s hard to get on with life, but you usually have to. – It’s hard to have conversations because you’re stuck in your own gloom, but you still have to talk to people. – It’s hard to get out of your bipolar fog and work, but you have to sit down and at least get started. – It’s hard to feel any hope, but you have to remind yourself that there is always hope because this is at treatable illness and it won’t always be like this.

Can you tell that this is what I’m saying to myself today? I have been sick for months off and on- lots of depression and rapid cycling between feeling pretty normal and then going way down. I haven’t had much hypomania- which is a bit odd as it is finally sunny here (off and on!) [ Read More ]





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