I really appreciate and learn from reader comments. I read all of them. I try to respond as much as possible. I especially appreciate comments that give different opinions to what I’ve written on the blog and in my books. I really mean this. My view of bipolar disorder is not the only view- that’s for sure!
I’ve learned so much since I became well enough to write my books- this was in 2001. Not that long ago! Since then I’ve found a medication that has helped immensely with my symptoms (Lamictal) and have continued to use my Health Cards treatment plan- but there are definitely areas of my writing regarding myself that are out of date. It can be hard to see your ideas in print when you have changed your situation! For example, in my books Bipolar Happens and Tips for Talking with Health Care Professionals, I mention quite often that I can’t take meds. That changed and now I have to go back and edit the books to make sure they reflect my current situation. My ideas in the books are the same- I just have to keep them up to date on myself!
Do you write about this illness? Do you have a blog? I have found that writing saves my life. I can write when I feel too depressed to live. I can also see the hypomania in my writing as I use over the top happy words and my thoughts are faster than my hand.
The writing reminds me that I have been sick before and I will be sick again- but it’s an illness and not the real me. I wrote my traditionally published books (Loving, Take Charge and Get it Done) while very depressed and often a bit psychotic. Oh well!
So please do keep sending comments. They make me think and really help me move forward when life seems impossible.
Julie
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Hi Julie, I think writing in general is a really good expression of what’s going on inside us at the time. I have a blog, and I journal, I also write alot of poetry. There are times when I’m not able to write poetry at all, but then there are other times when the words flow like crazy. I have a hard time keeping up with them. I used to blog personal feelings, but now I blog other things. my journal is a real representaion of my status at the time. It’s good to have, I can look back upon it, and see what meds I was on, my moods, what I did when depressed or manic etc. I highly recommend journaling, or having a diary. If you like to write poetry, It can be a total window on to your status also. When I look back at my poestry over the last few years, I see so many mood changes, and thoughts that wouldn’t go out of my head. I really hope to someday put then into a collection, and publish them. I would also like to publish an autobiography, it’s taking a long time to write, but hopefully someday I’ll get it finished.
Wishing you a wonderful day, with peace, and happiness.
Hugs,
Tehenita
Dear Julie, my name is Alex, I’m in Monrovia and my colleague Jean gave me your blog address.
I would like to explain the case of my wife, which she has continuos change of mood and common plans.
I knew her from 4 years and we are married almost from a year. She was living here with me for almost two years but a month ago she went back to her country (Bulgaria) because she told me she can’t live without job for so long. She’s a journalist and she restarted to work there. Since I knew her she has been always having continuous change of mood and behaviour, most of the time she’s a very sweet and kind person, but during these moments which follow argue between each other she become very aggressive and bad. Sometime I have the impression that they are two different persons inside one body and I can tell you is very hard to keep a normal connection with her. Sometime we stay days without speaking each other, other times she tell me that she want to close our connection. In the other side the last past few months she was making plans of making a baby with me, now she almost forgot that. Till today i was not aware of the bipolarism, has I wrote above frequently I thought that my wife has a double personality or even life, when she’s with me she’s very sweet but after few days we stay away she almost forgot about me, leke if she has one model of life with me and another when she’s back in Sofia, her home place. Thank you for your time and advise. Best regards, Alex
Hello, I get your emails & just got the one where you tell what constitutes bipolar 1 disorder vs. bipolar 2 disorder. However, I believe your description is incorrect in that I have NEVER had a full-blown manic episode–only hypo mania or mixed episodes–yet I have been dxed as bipolar 1 disorder as I did have delusional thinking (paranoia; beliefs that were not real that were “cured” with Abilify; also take Lamictal & some other meds as well for anxiety & severe insomnia).
For me hypo mania was total BLISS. No agitation or anything (unlike when I was in mixed) but I definitely did act out of character as I felt extremely elated & confident (not my strong suit) ; energetic after only sleeping 2-3 hrs. a night–plus I did do the overspending; I think that because my husband makes a good living ; I didn’t go totally out-of-control (spending $600 in 4 hours at a discount shop; then buying an $800 vacuum cleaner; gold-plated tweezers–surely a necessity!) it didn’t cause us to go into economic distress–though he definitely had discussions w/me about my purchases.
Also, small thing, but in your “bio” you have not spelled “severe” correctly when you write about “sever depression.”
I also didn’t think a dx of bipolar 2 would be possible if you heard “voices” or had delusions. I thought that would “bump you up” to bipolar 1.
Your comments & helpful advice about coping; wellness tools are very helpful to me. Thanks so much!!
Hi Suzanne,
Thanks for your great comment. I will defintely check on the sever vs severe. Darn spell checks don’t pick up on the wrong use of a word!
As for bipolar one and bipolar two. Both can have a lot of psychosis. I have bipolar II and believe me, I hear voices and see things that aren’t there all of the time.
The exact definition of Bipolar one is full blown mania. Otherwise the illnesses are the same. Full blown mania tends to come with full blown psychosis (in 70% of the cases) which is where it can get confusing. Bipolar one can have a lot of hypomania including the spending you describe (gold plated tweezers! awesome!), but it usually leads to full blown mania. Bipolar two can have a lot of hypomanic episodes, but they never lead to full blown mania.
A lot of general practioners are not aware of the distinction- those with psychiatric experience have usually studied the illness. You can defintely have delusional thinking with bipolar two. It may be that your diagnosis was based on psychosis and not mania- if you had your delusional thinking while you were hypomanic, that’s rare- unless it’s mixed with depression. If you had it with depression, it’s more normal. I have a LOT of paranoia when I’m depresed. I use my Health Cards treatment plan to deal with it. It sure can mess up relationships!
Thus, you can talk with your doctor again about the bipolar one diagnosis. I am glad you haven’t had full blown mania- everyone I know who has experienced it says it’s awful. I am like you- I get the bliss mania- the problem is that it goes down very quickly!
Thanks again for your comments- write any time! Julie
Hi Julie,
I have been receiving your newsletters for a couple of years now and find them to be very helpful.
I have just spent close to one year going through a medication change that kept me out of work. I’m scheduled to go back to work in the fall. For the most part I;m feeling pretty good, but I still hit some klinker days that make me feel like it’s the first day of another long and painful depression. I panic. Even when I’m feeling good, I’m sometimes unable to get myself to do day to day tasks such as laundry and cooking. I spend more time worrying about than it would take to do it.
For yeas I have had weight issues that started with my diagnosis of Bipolar II. Recently I find that a lot of my thoughts are consumed with food. I would appreciate any hints you might provide. Thanks Heidi
I have two blogs. One is about bipolar, work, medication, etc.
But on a depressed day I also started “my happy blog” where I never mention any problems. I just try to make it fun and beautiful. I write about happy memories, and put in pictures, comic strips and jokes. I never mention the future. It helps to read and write it.