Here is a comment from Marcello- a reader from Texas. He told me what it feels like to have a manic episode.
“I can hear myself talking and talking these days. I have trouble letting people finish their sentences and always feel the need to get my words in. It’s embarrassing as it’s hard to monitor myself when I’m actually in a conversation. I know it’s happening! But it feels so good to talk- especially after a depression that made me so desperately unhappy. My friends are used to my talking- I just apologize and try to be a good listener when I’ve got too much manic energy. Then I have to face reality and talk to my nurse practitioner. I use your books Julie, but the mania still shows up. I wish that I could keep it away forever. As always, it feels better to be up than down- but being up has its own major problems: sleep issues, not eating (this is great for me, but a problem for others), the desire to drink, no desire to work and grandiose thoughts.
A few days ago, after a few days of depression, I woke up feeling ‘better.’ I thought what I always think- oh thank heavens the depression is gone. Then later that afternoon I had the thought, “America is such an amazing place. It’s so beautiful!” and then when I was at a movie theater, “I’m the most famous person in this room!” It’s very hilarious in some ways.
Not a good sign at all. It took me awhile to realize and admit that i was hypomanic (mild mania) and it made me sad to think I was rapid cycling again.
Rotten illness. I hate doing it, but I have to be honest with my friends and family and let them know I’m manic so they can help reign it in. I started my mania Health Card where I write down my mania symptoms so that I can go back and compare them to what I am feeling now. What I wrote is verbatim to what I am saying now. I guess the mania is real.
I then have to prepare for the inevitable depression and use my Get it Done techniques to deal with it.
You taught me that Mania is not GOOD and depression is not BAD. The are two sides to the bipolar coin.”
Thanks Marcello!
Julie
