I work with a lot of clients in my coaching business who find it hard to understand some of the odd behaviors of their loved ones. Here are the symptoms:
1. Want to work- have time to work- have ideas for work- but can’t work.
2. Can’t see the signs of mania even though others can see them 100%.
3. Make choices that make the depression or mania worse even when they know they are making a big mistake.
4. Stop taking meds even when it’s obvious the meds are working really well.
5. Get angry and then expect the family/work/friends etc. to just bounce back when their mood changes.
6. Refuse help- even if it means they lose a relationship/job/friend/home, etc.
It may seem odd to call the above list ‘symptoms’- but they are. All people with bipolar have the above behaviors- so that means they are symptoms of the illness. A plan in place is the only way to prevent the above. I use my Health Cards- if you have not read Take Charge- that is the best beginning book I know- I coach families and partners, I DO IT ALL. And I help a lot of people every day- And I still have the above symptoms that I have to fight constantly. If I am affected by the illness the same way you are and the same way your loved ones are affected- that shows you that you’re not alone when bipolar tries to take over. It does this to all of us.
Julie
Thank you Julie,
It’s nice to get this reminder that I’m just a person with “normal” Bipolar symptoms, because they certainly don’t seem normal to others. Of all the things I do, symptom #5 on your list is probably the hardest to explain to others. After I’ve been really depressed all I want to do is push the “reset” button and start over fresh trying to do things better. Unfortunately, coworkers, friends and family don’t understand that. I need to let go of all the bad feelings from my most recent episode, and put the tough stuff behind me. Others don’t understand, get angry and accuse me of trying to sweep everything under a rug. This is the most difficult part of relationships for me. I get really irritated when I’m reminded of issues that I just want to let go of and have to remind myself that others are not thinking about things like I am and have a right to work on issues even though I’d rather forget about them.
Having had major depression for over 25 years, I’m still trying to adapt to the change to a diagnosis of Bipolar II this summer. I resisted it at first, but have learned to accept and acknowledge that it is a better diagnosis for me. Your blog and books are really helping me. Thanks for speaking out and being such a role model for all of us “bipolarites”. (What do we bipolar people call ourselves anyway?)
Thanks again,
Susan in Alaska
Bipolarites! I love it!
Bipolars
Those of us with bipolar
Bipolar People
Weirdos (ha ha)
Thanks for your comments. Our mood swings can be so random and they can leave so suddenly- and all we want to do is move on- and yet we have to see how others are doing- we may have hurt them a lot! Your insight is amazing- and it only took 25 years! 🙂 Julie
Oh my gosh, can I identify with Symptom #2!
It has taken me YEARS to just BEGIN to identify when I’m manic, and even then, I don’t always know! It usually seems to take someone else to tell me that I’m in a manic phase and then, when they tell me what behaviors they’ve seen, it’s really easy to understand why they said I’m manic!
No wonder those of us with BP need a support team!
Sandra
I am extremely frustrated with the first symptom on your list. Over the past 15 years I have gone from working in the Clinton White House to teaching dance to now not even being able to commit to doing a single performance because I can’t count on myself to follow through. All I’m really able to do right now is make art about my frustration, some of which is up on my blog impactplasticbag{dot} blogspot{dot}com. I also had a fatal car accident (not for me, for 2 other people) in 2009 so I have PTSD on top of bipolarity. Yuck!