I used to hear these comments a lot before I was diagnosed. (I still hear some of them now!)
- Why can’t Julie just settle down?
Why is Julie always doing things that make her sick?
What is Julie’s problem? - Why is Julie so weird?
They were often said to my mom.
My mom and I both know what to say now- we have educated everyone we know about the illness. The Health Cards helped as they educated her first.
Now, I see it as an educational/informational opportunity.
Here is what I say:
I know my behavior seems odd… (fill in the behavior here). It’s normal for people with bipolar disorder to be this way- most of us have trouble with… (fill in the problem here!) We try hard to function in a normal way, but just like someone with a physical illness like (choose your illness!) we have so many darn challenges. I love the books by… (Julie!) I think you would find some interesting info about bipolar disorder that can help you see that I’m not weird, I just have a weird illness.
**
Then it’s up to them to either remain ignorant or support you. You’ve done your best. I’ve found that almost everyone responds to this in a positive way unless they have their own mood issues they are not addressing….
Julie
PS: My books Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder and Take Charge of Bipolar Disorder have specific sections for family members. If you can get them to read the books, life will be a lot easier for you!
I’ve just recently found your blog and your website. I started dating a woman about a month ago. I am crazy about this woman but am about at my wits end. She told me fairly early on that she was bipolar and medicated. So I started reading everything I could to learn more both for myself and to find ways of being supportive for her.
Is there any advice you would give someone just beginning a relationship with someone with bipolar disorder? I have your book on order in hopes that it has some practical tools for me.
Hi Julie,
I have tried everything you have suggested to educate my family on bipolar disorder/depression/ anxiety. They choose to remain ignorant. It is truly frustrating and adds to my depression that I don’t have support in my own home. I know it must be hard for them but if they could just open their minds and hearts it would help us all a great deal. I visit your blog everyday and it helps to know I am not the only one struggling and I really do have the support I need. Thank you once again for all your hard work!