This is a post from 2008- it’s so good I have to post it again. The good news is that traveling is much, much easier for me now.
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I have to admit I’m a bit stressed.
I go to Florida for a large convention this weekend to give my presentation: Loving Someone with a Mental Illness. I’m not worried about the presentation. There is nothing I love better than getting in front of family members and hearing their stories- we can definitely learn from each other. I remember what it was like to love someone who was in the psych ward for three months and then still sick off and for a year after that. I can pass on my tips for dealing with the fear.
My stress is from getting ready for the travel. The airline that is too busy to even answer my calls- “We are experienceing a high call volume- you will have to call back later.” The CD’s of my radio show I need to take with me have to get labels on them.”
On and on. I can do it. I just have to stick to the basics.
I recently heard a gentleman give a speech about remembering the basics – he told the story of his son’s baseball team. He said, “The team had done great all year- then when they faced this really big pitcher, they started to fall apart! My son swung at a ball that looked ten feet over his head! If we had just rememberd to play the basics- only swing at balls in the strike zone- we could have hit this guy, but we forgot the simple things.”
There is a chance right now that I could swing at the balls 10 feet above my head! But I won’t. I have a list and I have to methodically do it- no matter what my mood.
julie
My experience with those who suffer from mental diseases is quite similar to what Julie describes. Several friends have what I can only describe as a heightened sense of stress to events to which many of us have little or no reaction. As I watch and listen to friends, I can gather the immense effort that they need to undertake to quiet their response. So many times we as loved ones or friends “tire” of their reactions. I can only say that we should all appreciate the effort they are already going to calm their concerns. Think of when you have had an aching back which would just not stop hurting and how that affected your response to the events around you. At some level it can be debilitating. The same holds true with anxiety responses. It can overwhelm. Understanding their feelings without judging them is key to being a friend. Accept their feelings about the stress without acknowledging the reality of them. In this case acknowledge that they feel stressed about the trip, not that things are going to go wrong.
She also has it right in her response to be methodical and things will work out. The proper response from both the person with the illness and the loved one will keep the situation managable and end up with good results.
As a friend or loved one, remember that they have to live with the disease all the time, we only have to help them with their response. That helps us keep perspective on how hard they struggle.
Julie,
I’m so glad you’ve been planning ahead for your conference. Getting to sleep early and packing is good preparation for the trip. That’s the trick to BiPolar disorder is preparation and taking care of yourself and you do a good job at that. I’m so proud of you! I wish you all the best and have a safe trip.
I must bwe getting old. The font is a little small for me. Do you also have a radio show? I don’t see it mentioned here.
See you at the Convention! My husband and I are interested in your perspective, as I am a consumer and he, of course, is a loved one.
Julie, It’s hard to read the blog with such a dark background. Also, a little larger font would be nice. We are in Florida visiting my sick father in law. He is doing better, but is basically on his way out. It’s very sad.
I loved your radio call in. It was great.
Hi all,
Many have written and told me the blog background is too dark.
This happens if you use Mozilla as a browser. I am going to take care of the problem- and yet I realize that those with the problem won’t be able to read this!
I will also increase the font size.
Julie
Julie
I just got back from Cancun, I was so manic, and stressed I lost controll, about how long does it take, befor one that is bipolar to start getting through trips, as of now I dont want to ever go on another
I am writing on behalf of my brother, Donald Ramsay.