“I’ve triumphed over bipolar disorder, not experiencing an episode since 2006. “
Guest Blog Karen Tyrrell…My Triumph Over Bipolar Disorder
My name is Karen Tyrrell, Australian mental health advocate and author of Me and Her: A Memoir of Madness. I’ve triumphed over bipolar disorder, not experiencing an episode since 2006.
As a teacher, disturbed parents of one of my students repeatedly harassed me to the breaking point and beyond. For over a year, these parents dished out daily verbal, written, emotional and psychological abuse. I couldn’t escape them. The school encouraged me to discuss my angst with a counsellor but I laughed it off, saying I was all right. But I wasn’t. I developed extreme stress, anxiety, night terrors and sleep deprivation. Over time, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder caused my bipolar to come out, me becoming severely manic and psychotic.
Police forced me into a psychiatric hospital under an involuntary treatment order. I spent weeks refusing medication and treatment. Eventually I accepted my diagnosis. After I was released, I was determined to recover. I immersed myself into Julie’s book, “Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder” creating my own individual wellness plan, striving to understand my triggers and how to avoid them.
I tried different coping techniques, working out how to combat fluctuations in my mood. I empowered myself with pro-active strategies… a brisk morning walk with positive gratitude, visualization techniques, mindfulness (living in the Now), a calming sleep routine, daily meditation and expressive writing.
I literally wrote myself to recovery. Daily journal writing created a positive way to reflect on my issues and my ongoing treatment, producing a powerful cathartic effect. When I scribbled down my angst and my inner most thoughts, a weight was lifted from me. Writing gave me a voice, a way to express myself, to make sense of what was happening to me.
I’m thrilled creative writing became my new passion. I converted my daily scrawls into what many have called a brave memoir. Me and Her: A Memoir of Madness narrates a teacher’s journey through harassment, mental illness and recovery. I share my wellness strategies via a FREE newsletter. Please leave a comment below and on my website. if you wish to subscribe. http://www.karentyrrell.com
Exciting news! We now have an update on Karen’s work. So much has happened since she first posted with BipolarHappens! Click here to read her latest news.
Thank you so much Julie for inviting me to share my story of bipolar recovery with your readers. If anyone would like to ask a question, please feel free to ASK. I’m here *LIVE* online from Australia … Karen 🙂
I think it great that Karen can share her story and hopefully inform/help others who have bipolar or are supporting a family member/friend who does. the best bit is that through the internet, her message and story cam be spread worldwide.
Hi Stephanie,
Thanks so much for checking out my Guest Blog over at Julie’s page.
I’m sure excited to be here and to receive your awesome support.
Please take care … Karen x
Dear Karen,
Thanks so much for sharing your story. It is an inspirational journey that I am sure you must be helping many others who have gone through this journey.
Congratulations again.
Paul.
Hi Paul,
Thanks for your amazing support you’ve given me over the last month and the awesome suggestions, which I’m working on.
WOW, and you’ve followed me over here to Julie’s wonderful page too!
Cheers,
Karen 🙂
This is such a wonderful post. I can’t imagine being symptom free for so long. I admire what you have done Karen. It’s inspirational! I put this on the Julie A. Fast Fan Page! Julie
Thanks so much Julie, for your awesome words of support. I’ll go to your fan page and check it out … Karen 🙂
Do you teach now?
Hi Crystal, I returned to teaching after each major episode to prove that I could. I’m now fully recovered and manage bipolar disorder. I go into schools to present Creative Writing workshops to children as an author… Karen 🙂
I’ve been reading the book “Get it done while you are Depressed”, it’s actually quite good and I’m now realizing how my negative behavior has cost me my job of 32 years, my friends, family and isolating myself to the point that it is very hard for me to get out of the house even for groceries. Ironically, I was removed from my job at National Institute of Mental Health, the very place where they treat conditions like mine, for my out bursts of mania and depression so bad I wanted to end my life most days. It got to the point I could not go to work any longer b/c I just had such trouble with comprehending and remembering anything and crying most of the time or being so suicidal. All these years I was being treated for depression and panic attacks and I would not accept the fact that I was so much more out of control and was forced to face the fact that I was Bipolar, despite being diagnosed with it at 25 years of age. I went off all medications and was in a remission of some sort for a few years where I could actually function. This all came crashing down in 2005, with my daughter’s diagnosis and subsequent hospitalization when she cut her wrists and was sent to a residential treatment facility. She is still not stable and have raised her by myself all these years. It has been very hard for me to take care of her and myself with little money and now no money, since my job loss. I’ve no where to go and really don’t know what the future holds for me. I’ve applied for disability but don’t know what will happen, as most cases are not being approved. I’ve lost everything and don’t know where to turn. Believe me, I’m in a truly bad place right now, and the stress is really not helping too much either. By the way, this horrible disease and having a brother who was diagnosed at 12 years of age with Schizophrenia has made me realize how these two disease are very much alike, even the medications are very similar. I’ve not given up hope but I certainly can understand how this horrible disease has robbed me of happiness and it’s so hard to see any type of future a head of me. My family history is full of relatives with “nervous breakdowns”, and alcoholism. I believe that most people who are Bipolar have a very hard time believing it, after being truthful and desperate for relief, I am finally being treated for my mood disorder, although the meds need some fine tuning right now! I’m here to tell you not to lose hope, that someday there will be a medication that will help it. Of course I’m angry at the people who fired me, but I started to realize that my behavior and illness were all part of it and I can only move forward from here. Most days it is very hard for me to get out of bed. I’m 49 and really had only 5 more years until I could reach full retirement with what would have been almost 40 years with NIMH. I’m really down to nothing and will have a hard time living on the small amount that disability offers. I won’t even have enough for rent, 1500.00 a month will not work with a daughter who has yet to complete high school.
Hi Eileen,
Thanks for sharing your experiences so honestly here.
There’s hope for you. I’m now fully recovered and manage Bipolar on a daily basis. I share my Guide to Recovery and my wellness tools with everyone via my free eBook *Top 30 Tools for Wellness* on my website … Karen Tyrrell 🙂
Thanks for the support. I plan on reading your book as well!!! I’ll check out the website. I was diagnosed as a rapid cycling type of Bipolar at 25, but dismissed it as I didn’t believe I could possibly be, well after going through a type of PTSD experience like you, I cracked and held on as long as I could, I do believe that stressful situations (and mine were incredible) can bring it out of you if you are vulnerable to this horrible disease, I find it interesting that one can be almost normal at times and then totally off the next. My brother was diagnosed with a young age with paranoid schizophrenia and is currently homeless, and has been very ill most of his life. I’m currently on many meds, but am still quite depressed since being fired from my job of 32 years, ironically at NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health). I’m out of money right now and am currently looking for someplace to live that I can afford for that amount. I’m living off of credit cards, which is the only way I can survive right now. The disability hasn’t even been approved yet. Talk about being thrown under a bus by the very people who treat this disorder and worked directly with the Mood Disorders Branch!!! Anyway, thanks for listening and I look forward to reading your inspirational book very soon!!!! Eileen 🙂
Hi Eileen,
Thanks for supporting my recovery book, *ME & HER: a Memoir Of Madness* and sharing your experiences with PTSD and Bipolar Disorder.
Like you, severe stress triggered these disorders.
The Good News is you can learn to manage your illness with coping skills and live a healthy, happy life again.Its all about developing a pro-active wellness plan and avoiding your triggers. Take care … Karen http://www.karentyrrell.com 🙂
hi Karen, please email me. julie
I’m sorry this is so long, I wanted to tell my story. It really feels good to get it out in a blog. I’m hoping to connect with people who have had a similar experience. Thank you for considering this blog.
Hi Eileen. You never, ever have to worry about writing too much! That is what blogs are for. I know that you have helped many people with your insight and honesty. Thank you! Julie
Thank you Julie! You are an inspiration and I’ve been reading your website all day. I got your book on Amazon and I really like it b/c it doesn’t beat around the bush, but you’ve got such a unique and kind way with words it makes it so easy to read and sometimes reading is challenging at best for people with BiPolar. I just wanted someone to connect with who has the same problems as me, and from what I’m reading and your advice I finally have found a place to go. Bless you and thank you for writing so many great books, which I intend to read. Eileen
Hi again, it’s me. I’ve been pretty bad, suicidal, racing thoughts, anger issues. Well, I knew I was getting so much worse and was very lucky to get an appt with my Psychiatrist today, perhaps not. Anyway, I’m on a pretty high dose of Effexor XR (for me), I’m off the Trileptol (it was making me very irritable and even more angry when he took the dose up after I got fired), still on Klonopin twice daily and Concerta XR for ongoing ADHD. Also take meds for non working Thyroid (Thank you Lithium!) and Zocor for very high cholesterol. I mean I couldn’t even be typing this right now it it wasn’t for the Concerta, it helps me stay a bit focused, but not loads I was first diagnosed with ADHD at about 10 or so and was immediately but on large amounts of Ritalin. If you look at my prior blogs, Schizophrenia and BiPolar run in my family. My daughter tried many times to kill herself and was put in hospital and residential treatment, she’s a bit better now that she’s 18, but still has issues and I still have to deal with them and help her, she also takes lots of meds. I love her and didn’t realize how not having a cent has effected us. I have a hard time helping myself right now. I blamed myself, for giving her this horrible disease. I kind of knew I had this disease but could function and was almost free and clear at times, not anymore. I’m going off the Trileptol and starting Seroquil, I’ve been on it before. Had a horrible response to Lithium and lost my thyroid, then Lemictol worked, but I got the rash and had to stop, I didn’t want to though. I looked quite frightful as the rash was all over my face and neck. Anyway, Seroquil is my main topic right now. It helped me sleep but I gained a ton of weight and developed diabetes (had to stop), I will try it again, because I need to stop my mind from going off on these incredibly fast cycles, the fact that my Psychiatrist actually yelled at me to (“Start looking for a place to live, have you tried a shelter?” This really freaked me out, but you know I will be homeless, I’m down to the last few dollars, my credit card has been deactivated. I know I need the Seroquil to stop my rapid thoughts so I can at least sleep, witch I’ve done very little of since job loss and the mind numbing depression is almost too much to bare right now. Trying to get disability (it hasn’t been approved and is only chump change, not even enough to rent a one room appt.) Let alone groceries, and other needs for me and my daughter. I was feeling optimistic at first and ready for big changes, but that has turned into not being able to even feel stable or confident enough to look for a part time job. We are to be out of here I think I’m just leaving everything behind, I can’t deal with it and have no where to put it. That’s what NIMH did to me!! I actually called NIMH (my prior employer of 32 years)today and basically told them all what I thought about them, I yelled and told them I would sue, was getting an attorney, would take it to Capital Hill if I had to. LOL, talk about delusional, no one will discuss anything with me, friends at work have turned there back, other people I considered friends have turned their backs, sometimes you just want to get it out there. Stigmatization at it’s finest.!!! Oh, believe me I told them exactly what I thought of them and to me although it was a crazy thing to do, it actually helped me get it out. I was a good employee that got too ill to work and again was punished, just like the broken record player, I keep repeating all of this, no one is listening and they don’t care. What do you do when you have nothing to fight for anymore? And my COBRA insurance what a laugh, will run out, that’s another big issue. NIMH, they may do good research on these horrible mental diseases, but they sure don’t treat their long term employees very well, and they knew what I had and my daughter. I’ve got no one, praying doesn’t work right now, I just can’t anymore. This is just to let you know what it’s like, I hope to God nobody else is ever in this position, imagine being fired after with 5 more years to go until your full retirement and losing it all, and I do mean all.
I teach now. I had issues when I first found out that I was bipolar in 2005-06. I got things together within 6 months or so and did not have any major instances until 2013. I have been up and down since August or September of 2012. I went into the hospital in Jan. 2013 and when I got out I took another week off before I came back to teaching. I do not get any breaks during the day and on days like the one I am in now, it is hard not to scream at the kids even when they are not doing anything major. I want to cry scream, etc. I am not sure where to go or what to do. I don’t know how you can be symptom free for so long and I can’t imagine not teaching. I just don’t know where I fit in right now.
Hi Crystal,
I understand what you’re saying. My last episode was in 2006. I’m now a full time mental health advocate and go into schools to teach creative writing.
My latest book ME & HIM: A Guide to Recovery shares how I triumphed from bipolar disorder and PTSD … 30 steps I took to empower myself to recover and manage bipolar.
ME & HIM won several 5 STAR reviews from major mental health organizations.
http://www.karentyrrell.com/mental-health-leaders-embrace-guide-recovery/
Read #15 pages for Free… http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00BMMQ036
My children’s mental health picture book comes out in October.
Please stay tuned. http://www.karentyrrell.com
Take care,
Karen xx:)
I have bipolar II and have gone to many s[pecialists and spent tens of thousands of dollars to find out THAT IT CANNOT BE CURED just managed.. It is very hard to diagnose and many may think they may be bi-polar but suffer from another emotional malady or can cope with a mild case.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/bipolar-you/201206/can-bipolar-disorder-be-cured-0
**Hi Mark,
Great Article! I will do all I can to find a cure for this illness- I have used all that is out there and all that has worked is using my management plan with meds. I’m open to anything. Why can’t we find a cure? Many illnesses we thought were impossible to cure such as Small Pox and Polio have basically been eradicated. Maybe it will happen for us too! Julie
Why cant we find a cure? Big Pharma is using old meds. Must not be enough money in it… Jefferson Hospital in Phila is doing research and ther is a trail going on to test a medication being used in Canada for bipolar that is not allowed in the United States. I believe the number is 215 503 2833. I tried to get in it but was rejected. There was a doctor at U of Pennsylvania that was experimenting with this drug. Head of the dept. Seems real crazy to me.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ketamine
I know that all of you have visited a shrink or many shrinks. This may be helpful to some of you. Its a database of how much your shrink is making from pharmaceutical companies to push their drugs. It is still on going since the law was enacted not too long ago. I left mine because he was given over 75k to make speeches and the company he was speaking on my behalf just happened to be the one whose drug I was taking.
projects.propublica.org/docdollars/
Hi**Mark
I haven’t had an episode since 2006. I manage my Bipolar Disorder and Post traumatic stress disorder with a pro-active wellness plan. I wrote *ME & HIM: A Guide to Recovery with #30 chapters on how to beat Depression and Anxiety, Stop panic attacks, Stress-less, sleep better, and I de-mystify Meditation and Mindfulness. Please check out my website www. karentyrrell.com Karen 🙂
Anyone hear of Amino acid therapy for bipolar?