I find that a really loaded question these days. Do I tell the truth? Part of the truth? Do I side step the question or do I lie?
When a person is depressed, it can be hard to answer the typical how are you question with an honest reply.
How am I? Thank you for asking. I have been suicidal for months and fear for my life, but I just keep going on and on and on.
How am I? I’m fine, thanks. How about that basketball game last night!
How am I? I had a manic episode last summer that ruined my marriage. Other than that, things are great!
How am I? I am so anxious I feel I am going to implode, but I have to get out in life to make money so that I can have enough money to buy my meds. My life is a mess.
Hmmmm. I don’t think that is what people want to hear. If you are sitting across a table from a friend and they say, “Julie, how are you really?” then you can say the truth.
Here is how I answer the how are you question. If things are going well, I am honest. If things are only mildly bad, I say, “I’m fine thanks!” If things are awful, I say, “It’s not a good day today. Let’s talk about you. We can talk about me later.”
I have worked hard on this so as not to overwhelm people. I know when it’s appropriate to talk about myself and this illness.
Julie Fast
I find that anyone who knows me, can read the answer in my face. Anyone else I just tell a quick lie and move one
If I’m not doing well, I’ll sometimes answer “Not so good but thanks for asking.” I like your response of “Let’s talk about you,” I think I’ll add that.
With one of my very close friends I can say “I’m fine,” and she’ll ask “Are you really fine, or are you F.I.N.E.? (if you don’t already know that means it’s Fouled up, Insecure, Neurotic, Emotionally unstable).
Hello,
My younger sister age 26 was recently diagnosed as Bi-polar Schizophrenic. I love my sister dearly and am trying desperately to be as incredibly supportive and healthy for her as possible. I am desperately seeking advice on how to cope through this. I can not find a support group in my area and would sincerely appreciate some advice. My sister has been admitted to a Pysch hospital twice and still refuses to admit she is bi-polar or take medications. Is there anything I can or should do to help her see that her life is falling apart because she won’t stay on meds? She believes she has a spiritual connection to God and she uses the excuse that she was so good when she was younger that the “mistakes” she’s making are mistakes because she didn’t do them when she was younger, not because she is manic. I am desperate to find some answers and be the best sister I can be while still maintaining some sense of sanity.
My ex just always says “Still kicking.” It’s a non-answer that can be interpreted anyway one wants.
Hello Sharee,
I will answer your question in a blog post.
Julie
Hey Julie!
My disability has come through – yippee. In a bitterweet decision I have left my position at an agency I have been with since I was 18 in one capacity or another.
Since my hospitalization I have been writing like nobody’s business. I have many projects I am working on. I am hoping to make writing my career of the future.
Let me know any advice you have on writing and focusing on getting well.
Thanks for all you do!
– Melissa –