The following is a sample conversation you may have experienced if someone you love isn’t getting the help they need to manage bipolar disorder.
Marcee is a 28 year old woman who has been in and out of the hospital since her early 20s. She can’t hold a job, goes through constant boyfriends, drinks beer, smokes pot and gets very, very angry if anyone tries to talk to her about making positive changes in her life. Here is a sample dialogue:
Mom: Marcee, I really need you to see how bad things are right now. You never leave your apartment and your dad and I don’t know what do to. We’ve tried everything. You refuse your medications and I know you’re drinking again. What are your plans Marcee? We want to help you. We don’t know what to do!
Marcee: (cuts off her mom and yells): Leave me alone mom! Just leave me alone and get out of my apartment. If you are going to go on and on about this, there is no point in being here. Why don’t you go examine your own problems and just leave me alone? I don’t know why you’re on my case. The doctors were not sure when they saw me and I don’t have a real diagnosis of anything. Stick to your own life.
The conversation continues below…..
This is very serious and legally there isn’t much parents can do, but be warned she could be having ideas of suicide. Had a similar situation tried everything, son was on meds, unfortunately was not accepted by his friends unless he drank, caused havoc with his meds. His behaviour caused his friends to shun him, the world is a cruel place and doesn’t care or make time for people who are burdened with bipolar, they are shunned, that is why so many people refuse to take their meds or accept their illness. Sadly my son did committ suicide. So wake up world ! Friends and family can do a lot in someone who is lost life, a little kindness, a cup of coffee and friendship and most of all a hug. No one asked for Bipolar, they don’t want to be like this, read up about the condition if you care, there but for the grace of God go I !
You are all in my prayers may God stay close to you.
Heartbroken Mom
Dear Cathy,
I am very sorry to hear about your son. Suicide is my strongest fear for my BP son.
Being misunderstood seems to be one of the biggest hurdles for someone with BP and understanding how it feels and why they have behavior they do not want to share with the rest of the world is everyone’s biggest challenge. It is a huge lesson in being non judgemental and digging deeper to see who the person is not the person having symptoms of mental illness.
My heart goes out to you.
Blessings,
Lynne
I don’t have the problem with my parents. I am almost 58 years old and my life is totally upside down right now. No job, no health insurance, and credit cards bills you cannot believe. I did all of this spending when I was depressed, didn’t know about bi polar. I am going to lose everything. I think it started when my husband left me, actually today is our 37th anniversary. We have been separated since 2001 or 2002, I can’t remember. He has always cheated and I just took it. Anyhow, lots more on my plate but don’t we all. Sometimes I think it would be better if I just left this world, which I tried, but I won’t because of my faith in God. I guess I am stronger than I think I am, thanks to HIM.
I am third generation bipolar. My son committed suicide at 28. I take my medications every day. My sister will not take hers. She is so miserable, I can no longer be around her. I miss them both, but I have to live.
Mostly I do well on my meds, except the one to let me sleep. My mind won’t shut up. I try listening to my cassette player, but that doesn’t always work.
I take trazadone to help me sleep. It works very well.
I am so sorry to hear of your losses. My mom tells me that stuff all the time and I dont yell back at her but I dont listen to her either. I have been diagnosed bipolar for 5yrs and I havent done much to manage it Itried meds once but with small kids at home I couldnt stay medicated cause it made me where I would be walking and my eyes close cause I was sleepy all the time. New borns requirewide awake parents. I have 4 children now and I have a boyfriend who is living with me and he tries so hard to understand my disorder but I feel he has no clue what to expect except to try not to set me off. I love him very much and my children but I have no idea how to explain to them and get them to join me as a support system cause they are either too small or they are suffering from an illness also. My daughter isabel is 7yrs old and has beeen diagnosed adhd/bipolar. She is on meds cause she has medicaid and that is how it is afforded. Myself on the other hand have no insurance no job my boyfriend works but its barely enough to make the bills and morgage. So I dont go to the doctor or get any meds. I freak out on everyone in my life daily in some form or another. they are as lost as I am. It seems as if I have no control over myself. we will all be at home having a normal day my kids will start arguing like kids do over something petty and that sets me off and I start screaming at everyone and it ends up being an issue about how I do everything for everyone and what do I get a day of listening to them fighting over stupid stuff. And when I start yelling I use horrible words and say things I would never say or mean to them and afterwards when I have calmed down I feel really bad and appoligize but the words have already cut them I dont want to hurt my family with my actions anymore but have no idea where to turn. Or how to get help my mind never stays on one thought very long unless I am depressed and it seems as if I cant think of anything else.I have tried my best to get a job and keep it and can never stay very long because I feel threatened or axiety ridden over the stress to where I quit then feel stupid after its done. I am not trying to cry or whine to anyone I am begging for help and no one here seems to beable to help me and I have no idea where to turn if you can help me please I beg of you give me some advise any advise. I just want to make life easier for my family while with me. I hate to be the one who has a great family and treats them like crap. They deserve better and I want to be better.