Julie, how do I know if my partner really is better? He got out of the hospital last month after a massive manic and psychotic episode, but I feel like he is still sick. Julie, how long does this take and will ‘he’ ever come back? Loretta
Hello Loretta,
Yes, your partner will come back. Bipolar disorder symptoms are not permanent. With the right treatment, he will come back to homeostasis. You then need a management plan, but that is another topic!
Here is the list I use with clients when they ask how can they possibly know when someone is actually better.
Your husband is better when you see the following:
1. He acknowledges the trouble, pain and heartache he (due to his illness) caused when he was sick. “I am so sorry you had to go through this. It must have been hard for me to be in the hospital while you took care of the kids and kept the business running.”
2. Focus goes external instead of a selfish internal naval gazing that puts the blame on others. He will say, “I can see how I affect others and how my mood swings caused a lot of stress in the lives of the people who care about me. I was so sick I could only think of myself and what the world was doing to me. I now see myself and how my actions affect the world.”
3. Will discuss health care with you. ‘Yes, I want you to be at my next appointment. Create a list of questions you want to ask. We are a team.”
4. Will ask insightful questions about what happened. “I know I was pretty out of it. I have some memories of what happened, but I need you to fill in the rest. I do remember picking the fight at the work party. What else happened?”
These all show insight. When your partner has insight, you will know he is fully out of the mood swing.
It takes a year for the brain to fully get back on track after a massive episode, but… many improvements happen during this process.
Julie
