Bipolar Mania
Oh man, I had a terrible up swing yesterday! The problem with mania- well, there are so many problems with mania it would take a year to write them all down. The problem is that there are so many forms and they are all so sneaky. I’m an expert on mania treatment now- I have done everything possible to notice the signs of mania and get the mania to stop. And it still sneaks up on me.
I had a strong hypomanic episode yesterday. It started out fun and then felt like I was on a way too fast merry go round. I could feel my brain warping. I got so excited about my work I was giddy. It was a bit scary. I actually couldn’t tell if I truly was excited or if it was a mood swing. Looking back, it was 100% mania. People don’t go that wild when things go well. I didn’t do anything stupid. I wrote all about it in a newsletter you will get soon if you’re on the mailing list.
I tried so hard to keep it under control. I haven’t been that manic in a few years. Awful. But I made it through.
If you click on the mania subject tab to the right, you can read all of my mania entries- there are some great blogs on the difference between mania and hypomania- the two types of bipolar, medications and mania, etc. etc.
Mania is often more dangerous than depression because it’s so hard to spot and then hard to treat. I have learned to do it. We all have to learn to recognize and treat mania. I talk about it in all of my books- a lot. I use the Health Cards to treat it. I am thankful I have found a way to stop it before it goes too far.
Julie
hmmm… in response to this and your previous post — I’ve been wondering about myself lately in this regard. I’ve taken up swing dancing, which gives me tremendous joy, but the nights that there are dances, it’s hard to get home and get to bed at a decent hour, which for me is between 10 and 11. I’m having a wonderful time, but these nights of going out are also the first time in a couple of months I’ve had trouble falling asleep, and in some cases staying asleep. It’s insomnia, not mania, I’m pretty sure. I don’t FEEL manic, I THINK I’m just feeling good. My mood seems more stable, I’m more organized, productive and have more energy than I’ve had in a long time… but is it too good? Is it too much energy? I know that feeling really good can be a danger sign, but am not sure I know when it’s getting dangerous… I guess I’ll have to talk to my doctor, my therapist, people in my support group, friends and family, to get some feedback. I REALLY don’t want to give up swing dancing! And other dancing… it’s so good for my health in other ways!
I have a hypomania check list. The problem, of course, is that when feeling good the last thing I want to do is cut is short or decrease it. I suppose I look at hypomania as the payment due for depression, sort of a way to catch up and balance the books.
I’m revved up and getting amped out. I can’t concentrate on my work. I’m seeing the three S’s – speeding, spending & sex – on the increase. I battle with it constantly it seems and today I seem to be losing. I was triggered by the possibility of not getting to see someone I’ve been fantasizing about anymore so I’ve been trying to contact him. No-no. I took my PRN but it really isn’t helping. Good grief I’m having problems with this and I’m rambling to boot. Sorry.